Date: Monday 8th August 2011
Hare: Flatulence
Venue: Paul Scanlon Oval, Paradise Point
Runners: 25

Weeks to AGPU: 45
A smaller than usual pack gathered at the shelter, possibly due to the arrival of the cold westerlies or maybe that some of the Hierarchy were away enjoying the benefits of being Hierarchy, busy burying their snouts in the proverbial trough. Rumours circulated that it was going to be a punishing 11 kilometre slog, only for some it would turn out.
After the usual brief instructions that is was mostly on chalk with some minor paper and flour, basically meaning it was done at the last minute, on a push bike, with f..k all effort. And so it was to be as we headed up the hill towards the bowls club, with again no Hare in tow (a potential disaster in the making). Left through an easement and back and forward a few times before emerging on Oxley Drive and over to Tradewinds Avenue.

Fortunately a friend I passed on the way to the run told me of strange arrows outside his house tipping me off on the possible route. Botulism and I turned down Sundown Avenue leaving the others to continue on Tradewinds thinking they were going to Girl’s abode for a drink stop (not likely).

As we headed through the park and along the creek pathway we encountered a number of on backs, which seemed to result in a diminishing pack. By the time we reached the third on back and some parallel trails near the Coombabah Caravan Park there was only Botulism, Rock Hard and myself remaining, although others made suspect claims of completing the entire circuit.
We finally encountered the much anticipated bush sections only to struggle finding the trail, which had obviously been devoured by a mob of kangaroos we had passed previously. Somehow, with local knowledge and a bit of luck our trio of athletes continued on trail along the board walk then back north through the Coombabah back streets, with yet more on backs until finally emerging again at Oxley Drive for the short sprint home, not 11 k’s, but long enough.

Naturally on our return virtually all the pack were present with most claiming they had done the run bar a very small section (must have been the section where the flying pigs congregate). Rectum, however, came in rather late having been held up in traffic and had apparently completed the whole circuit. KB also arrived late, dressed in his shiny shoes saying he was delayed trying to “sort out partner issues”, does this mean there will be more to this story in forthcoming editions of the Bulletin?
With the GM, Blackstump and Veteran rubbing their snouts in the trough RA, Josephine, took hold of proceedings and asked Rock Hard and Botulism to give run reports, both saying it was long and lacked checks but still gave it a 5.75/10 mark.

Ferret commented on the food saying, yet again, the nosh lacked something, but the stew and strudel still came up with a respectable 7/10 score. Yours truly took over the RA role and noted that the beer bucket was being filled with crushed cans, bottle tops and loose change, obviously indicating the hard times befalling all of us due to the GFC mark 1 & 2.
VD also gave us an update on how Now Loved is going and we look forward to his return in coming weeks. Keep in touch with him guys. A cool breeze ensured a brief, but still humorous, circle and another good night enjoyed by all.

Down Downs:
Flatulence; Hare
Mother Brown; UK visitor
Flasher; Using 5 cent pieces for beer purchases
Flasher; Stood up on anniversary night
Bent Banana; Drinking from wrong hand during RA’s session
Bent Banana; POW (from Rectum) for handing over undersized shirts as donations
Mother Brown; Drinking from wrong hand
Bent Banana; Drinking from wrong hand (will he ever learn)
Sir Cumference; Going away to FNQ, TI and Rugby World Cup, back in October
Swollen (Kokoda Challenge), VD (Carnarvon Gorge), KB (sorting out partners); Returning runners

Footnote: I have great fears with Telstra having anything to do with the $40 Billion NBN given my recent experiences of moving 5 kilometres to a rental property on Ephraim Island. Our previous provider, Optus, found the address in seconds using Google Earth and advised they couldn’t transfer the service because Telstra has exclusive access. After some 12 days of moving , 10 phone calls, dozens of transfers, 3 cancelled and reactivated orders, Telstra still cannot find the address even though they currently service 385 units on the island. Currently we still have no phone (even though there is a dial tone and we can ring Telstra from it), no internet and no Foxtel. One operator from good knows where even advised, being on a remote island, we would require a “remote access satellite” service to ensure any possible communications even though the address is Paradise Point and we are connected to it by a 400 metre bridge, go figure! Bring back Sir Rabbit, Josephine, Old Fart and Head and they may stand a chance!
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Hash Family day lunch; Sunday 21st August 12:00 noon, all welcome, $10.00 per head, BYO booze. Being held at Botulism’s home,Chip In Place, Helensvale (next to golf club). Bring a chair and Please let Botulism know if you are attending
That is all,
On On from “The Desk”
Two Dogs