Host: Botcho

Location: Helensvale

Date: 29-01-2016

Hashers: 40

I have decided, upon request from today’s host, Sir Botcho, to do a bit of a write up of today’s Splinter lunch which is a very special occasion as it is the annual golf day combined with lunch from Sir Botcho’s lovely establishment overlooking the Helensvale Golf Club. This is also the second year that I have been privileged to be able to attend this auspicious event and to those of you who didn’t make it, let me tell you that you missed a cracker of a day!

Unfortunately I was not able to make the golf morning, but am told that it was great fun, of course with some premature indulging in alcoholic beverages along the way. When I asked Missing Link how the morning went, his response was “how do you think it went when most of us only play golf once a year!!”.  Apparently Rug, the GM of the Monday Hash and having the mere status of a punter at splinter (hmmm…that rhymes..I’m a poet and I didn’t even know it!) managed to basically get himself pretty well shit-faced on wine before the commencement of proceedings at lunch. The Splinter GM, Sir Rabbit, could only shake his head in disgust!!…not to mention Rug’s antics in stiletto heels and hoisting poor Montana over his head…oh dear…I think the photos tell it better than I ever could!!

The weather on the day can only be described as fucking awful….it was unbelievably hot!!!….and there was poor Sir Botcho slaving over two hot barbeques and with the pizza oven also blasting out heat behind him. It was like a fucking furnace in the cooking area and I can only commend Sir Botcho and his helpers on the magnificent effort in putting all of this together. Sir Botcho, in accepting thanks for his efforts, very touchingly said… ”it’s always my pleasure to put this day on..I love you all, I love the Hash, and I love doing this for you all”. A true bloody gentleman Sir Botcho and a credit to Hashing, you really are!!

The food was wonderful….tomato bruschetta starters…and in my case, washed down with copious amounts of beer…..which reminds me…thanks to Weekly for supplying beer to buy for those of us who felt it was too bloody hot to drink byo wine today…you saved our lives Weekly!!  Mains was barbequed steaks with baked potatoes, coleslaw, salad and fresh bread rolls….a carnivorously delightful meal…but of course, there were the whingers who complained that the steaks were underdone or overdone…Sir Botcho, you cooked mine to perfection so stuff the others!! Dessert was Sir Botcho’s usual…pavlova with lashings of cream….a tried and trusted favorite.

The Splinter GM, when asked to say something, in his usual sardonic style merely said…”I’ve got nothing to say” and went back to sitting there looking cool.

In all, a great afternoon and certainly worth taking a rostered day off to attend…again, thanks heaps Sir Botcho for opening up your house to this fine rabble of Hashers.

Sir Two Dogs gave us a summary of the golfing antics, being as follows….Worst golfer of the day, of course it has to be Flasher….and surprise, surprise, he was accused of shortcutting the course!!

Last placed team was that consisting of Shitbags, Fullershit, Truck Tyres. Second last placed team was Anchovy, Rug and Kel and the winning team consisted of XLPet, Two Dogs, Sir Rabbit, Missing Link and Now Loved. Congratulations lads!! The trophies were presented by Weekly.

To those of you who didn’t make it, really, it is worth making the effort…and to those of you who came to represent the Brisbane Hash, Shitbags and Anchovy, thanks guys…it was nice to catch up again after our fun-filled trip the Philippines.

That’s all folks!

Fanny Charmer