Hash Bike Ride
Date : 26th August 2012
Hare : Sir Slab
Venue : murwillumbah

When Lance Armstrong ( the guy who has imbibed more blood than Count Dracula) said the words “It’s not about the bike” I don’t think he was referring to his loose girlfriend more so the cycle and accessories that some people surround themselves with.

Imagine my surprise therefore, on arriving at the venue, a picture postcard perfect location, to beautiful sunshine and cool air temperature, at seeing a group of try-hards dressed in lycra with the latest carbon fibre bikes looking as though it was a warm-up event for the Tour De France.

My off-the-shelf mountain bike was looking decidedly second hand alongside these mighty steeds.

The only thing missing was a starters pistol as we set off, with Caustic surging to the front of the peloton. Flasher and I took a more leisurely pace and watched as the rest disappeared into the distance.

Quite some time later we arrived at the en-route hostelry with the lead group having already downed their first coffee.

I was shocked to hear that on the first hill ascent only two managed to stay on the pedals and cycle up the hill, everyone else walked. YES WALKED, in their lycra and clippy cloppy special shoes pushing their ultra expensive bikes. Mr. Armstrong you were indeed prophetic.

Caustic crusader was reported to have sounded like an asthmatic Darth Vader and unable to speak .

The food arrived in a rather hap hazard fashion but my eggs benedict was delicious, if you’re out this way (tyalgum) stop and have a nose bag.

Once sated we commenced the journey home (It’s a lot easier on the way back- Sir Slab) (No it’s not – Shat) which was a very agreeable jaunt.

Those feeling up to it re-adjourned to the pub at Tumblegum (its how it sounds to me) and procrastinated over a beer or two.

To those of you who failed to attend, you missed a cracking day, an enjoyable ride, a great breaky with a cold ale to quaff at the death.

Great effort Sir Slab, you have redeemed yourself after the boring run on Monday, we need to do this more often.

On On

Rectum
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