Run 1751
Hare: Blowfly
Location: Len Fox Park, Labrador
Date:23rd May. 2011

Where is the R/A ???? It’s pissing down!!!!!

Where is Sir A/H?

Where is Missing Link?

Where is everyone ????????

It’s 5.55Pm and Botcho, Veteran and Sir Slab have shown up!!!

5.57Pm .Ring, ring …. Caustic here … Where the fuck is Cumsmoke?? I’m going to have to drive myself !!!!

6.05Pm We have just hit double figures and the hare has finally shown up smelling like boiled chicken and soy sauce.

6.15Pm The rain has stopped and the total of 14 hashers including the hare head off wondering where the F$#@ the booze master is too!!!

A leisurely wander along the seawall for the walkers ends up at the Grand Hotel public bar for a celebratory drink funded by KB’s mate’s horse that came in a 9 to 1. The runners head out hoping like hell the trail is still there and end up at the Labrador dog park before the rain soaked trail disappears into the drainage system.

On On back to the nosh and a few cold beers …. Cumagen has turned up and 15 happy hashers settle into a meal made for 25.

Mrs Magg’s secret recipe “Beef chow min” enough chicken wings for an army followed by Blowfly’s homemade sticky date pudding and ice cream and Sir Rabbit’s contribution of tasty sweet bits stolen from a Mrs Rabbit function.

The pack is more than satisfied and comments of “Gourmet Hash is back” echo across the park.

The stand in – stand in – stand in – stand in GM Caustic finishes his hash cash duties discovering the black hole now looks more like a crater with only 14 payers tonight …the AGPU stands a serious chance of fish and chips in the park BYO.

Make sure you come along to Botcho’s this week for a great run and nosh and bolster the Hash coffers to boot.

Circle in 2 Minutes … Caustic has got his moment in the sun and dreams of his chances of GM at the AGPU.

First up is the hare …. Blowfly.

NOSH report …. Croc 12/10 acting, acting, acting GM … Excellent

TRAIL report ….. Two Dogs …Found most of the trail but got down to 4 runners in the end.

WALK report … Sir Slab…. nice walk cold beer too.

Rug gives the note.

Hash cash …. no show but the black hole is GROWING !!!

Hash crash (Aussie) …has failed the first horizontal marital planking exercise.

Hash crook ….. Mrs Rockhard …not too well recently, a few complications. All the best Rockhard.

Acting, acting, acting R/A Caustic calls for….

CHARGES…… Croc calls for Blowfly to explain the BLOW-BY causing Mrs Blowfly to be up the duff. No “gumboots” was the reply.

POW … Acting, acting POW, Botcho was commissioned by Dicky Knee to hand the POW to Cumsmoke for thrashing his beloved Essendon … But NO SHOW from the R/A sees the POW held over.

8.10PM Moonbeams calls “ END OF CIRCLE” (world record shortest circle pending)

Next week’s run … Botcho’s golf course pad. 26 Chip-in place Helensvale
The oven will be on !!!! Just look for the smoke haze.
Please attend …. we NEED the money!!!!

AGPU……. just one more run then
6/6/2011
Dress Hash Formal …. Top hats mandatory!!!!!
( Sir AH .. Blowfly is looking for his!!)
Pre-Lube Address is ;
The Boat Ramp carpark,
33 T.E.Peters Drive,Broadbeach
(In front of Freshwater Point Apartments)

Pre-lube Drinks and Nibbles
Meet between 4.30 and 5pm and leaving pre-lube venue SHARP 5.30pm

Dress Code
Hash Formal inc Hash tOP Hat,Hash Dress shirt and Hash Jacket/Tails

Entertainment
To be supplied however brush up on your pole dancing and planking !

Travel Arrangements
Make your own way there and back!

World record shortest circle nomination CANCELLED !!!!
Circle re-opened for 3rd time
Splinter lunch ….. Flames grill at Chevron Renaissance this Friday

Sir Slab gets flack over Caustic’s 2nd rate bike and driver error is resolved as the problem.

15 minutes of talking shit follows and it’s now 8.35 as a wet and VERY well fed pack wander home to the slippers and a hot totty.
On On

KB… Just one more !!!!!!!! YES !!!!!!!!

Run 1750
Hares: Mumbles & Rug
Location: Mumble World. Nerang
Date: 16th May. 2011

GCHHH Run 1750 Rug/Mummmmbles.

The Mummmmbles (playboy)mansion is the venue for this week’s run.

The GM’s away so the mice will play!!!!

Onnnnnnnnn Onnnnn oop tha ill, the pack heads off into the chilled darkness.

SCB’s are out in force and NOT ONE hashers does the full run. Rug drops out early to head back and save Mrs Rug’s catering gear ….. seems the bain-maries work so much better with water in them.
The pack is back in no time having cut half the trail off….. The walkers stumble in last but just in time for enough sausage rolls to feed an army. Followed by an excellent pork casserole, rice served up silver service in Mrs Rug’s catering gear used in Singapore to feed the Hash over there.

Then out comes the bread and butter pudding ……….. Rug has lifted the NOSH BAR to very high levels.

8.12pm Circle in 2 minutes.
8.15pm The SITTING circle starts (GM away privilege)

Acting GM Sir AH calls for the “Hobbit Hares” Rug and Mummmmmmmbles.

NOSH REPORT
Caustic ……. Catering superlative!!!!
Dicky Knee …….. Dessert gets 10/10
Josephine ….. I hated Bread and Butter pudding as a kid and I STILL do !!!

RUN REPORT
Bent Banana (standing in for Flasher) leads the pack astray and gets them totally off trail.
Rug explains his water run.
Moonbeams gives a note.

TWO DOGS is up next and gets his jacket for 800 runs …. seems he has another 100 runs to claim but there was no Hash official in attendance at the holiday resort.
Point Two gives the well deserved note.

Sir AH announces only 3 weeks to the AGPU …. late bribes welcome … refer Hash Cash or any Hierarchy member.
Miscarriage claims French lessons are under way for his quick dash to the Royal wedding and his twin brother’s Paris visit.

LOST PROPERTY ….. Hash towel … being sent special delivery to Sir Prince in the UK.

POW ….. Sir Slab

Sir Slab claims he has many PRICKS to consider.
Smart Pricks.

Dumb Pricks.
Big Pricks.
Little Pricks.
All Pricks.

But the award goes to POOR Prick Dicky knee that has to have a double knee transplant and lose 50 kgs
Then he is diagnosed with sleep apnoea and had to swallow radioactive tablets.
HOWEVER Dicky has announced he will cancel all of these and his secret transfer to Melbourne ( see Flasher) if his GM campaign is successful.

Mummmmmbles gives the nooooote.

Dicky spews at the ¾ mark on the DD.

R/A is next.
Seems GCHHH has made the records of the Brisbane Supreme court…. how rude of them!!!!!!!! Stating Hash has a SERIAL BINGE DRINKING reputation.

CHARGES …
Mumbles charges Point Two with failing the Intelligence challenge to untangle the Christmas bells inside two hours.
Mummmmmmmbles gives the note.

Miscarriage is off to the ROYAL wedding as the official Hash representative.
He is also representing GCHHH at the London Hash run next week while his twin is spreading goodwill an international relations.

Miscarriage again ….. Gets complimented by treasurer Wayne Swan on the Mackay stadium job. By government standards is has been exceptional……. only 40% over budget, 3 months late, Indigenous housing under the seating as a bonus and open air toilets to boot. Well done Miscarriage!!

Missing Link reports all on track for the AGPU … Not to be missed with the black hole in turbo mode.

Next week’s run ….. Blowfly

Seems Mrs Blowfly has had a minor miscalculation on the birth control methods and there is a little maggot on the way.
With the family Hash history this child is destined for a Hash career….. We feel it is our duty to assist with the naming of the child, so please send you suggestion to our web-site.

Splinter lunch will be a Flames Chevron Renaissance…. great steaks!!!!

Shat tells the joke of a unique tattoo on the inner thigh that has both visual and taste/smell senses stimulated.
Its 8.40pm .. The full moon is glistening over the Mummbles garden fish pond, the Playboy bunnies are just about to arrive at the mansion, Hash must depart!!

Moonbeams calls …. END OF CIRCLE !!!!

words can’t describe the talent that these two have. A must see!!
Turn your speakers up loud

Need more runs so that you can attend the AGPU? Help is not far away. The “RTS” (run trading scheme) is now being looked into. Ask the Hash Cash or Trail Master for details. I’m a little late posting this, should have been posted 1/4/2011. LOL

Run 1745
Hare: Mad Mike
Location: Dog Park. Mudgeeraba
Date: 11th April. 2011

Rain rain go away !!!!
Come again some other day !!!!
Sings the song of our R/A !!!

Mudgeeraba wilds are the backdrop for Mad Mike’s Mudgeeraba Madness …. On On into the rain heads a pack of 22 Hashers up hill and down dale through Mad Mike’s trail. Runners and walkers are back close together and a welcome cold beer under the same sized shelter as last week’s run keeps some of the pack dry.
Enough nosh for 40 hashers arrives after an extended time and portion control is in NO way needed. Beef stew with a touch of chilli over a bed of rice followed by chocolate sponge cake even stops our R/A after 4 serves.

Circle in 5 minutes rings out at 8.30pm.

CIRCLE …. Its 8.35pm

Shut the f%$# up !!!!! Flasher is getting cut !!!

Two Dogs announces the sublimely obvious …. “It’s raining GM “

HARE …. Mad Mike
“Lovely to have you back in town” announces GM Flasher.

“ Are you coming each week from now on ?????” YES GM !!!!!

NOSH report …. Josephine says “way over standard GM …….“ How will my pathetic hamburgers ever keep up with this ???
Ferret protests “No spuds GM “ …. bloody good job !!!!

Botcho offers the note.

RUN report …….. Ferret claims an injury likely to hamper his sex life and numerous SCBs …. confessing to being a SCB himself with VERY little of the run completed.
Bent Banana … commented on the new arrow style …Hmmmmmmmmmmm !
Cumsmoke gives the note.

RETURNING RUNNERS…. Mad Mike, Now Loved, Missing Link and Croc.

Croc been on an obesity tour GM!!!!

Now Loved on bereavement leave in Sydney GM!!!!

Mad Mike been getting over an accident 12 months ago GM !!!! But I’m back !!

Mi$$$$$$ing link been making megabucks in the Iza GM .. spent most of in Thailand GM looking for interpreters ???????

RUG gives the note.

YELLOW CODE …… Circumference nails it !!! “B” for Botcho GM.

The R/A is next……….
The hare Mad Mike is back for holding the run in a catchment area ……. nothing to do with the failed powers of the R/A ????????

CHARGES….. Miscarriage claims one our hashers has crossed the line on rule one ……. seems Josephine is into poetry cross-dressing and World War 2 hookers …….. “Not Me “ he protests!! Hmmmmmmm !!
Rug gives the note.

POW Sir Prince nominates half the attendees for POW ……

Botcho for spilling beer on the prince’s new shows,

Blackstump for laughing at poor Botcho getting his first icing,

Caustic for icing Botcho, a hard working non Hierarchy Hasher,

Missing Link, Sir Rabbit, KB and Miscarriage are all nominated.

Caustic gets the POW and takes two hopeless goes at downing it … a very poor effort for a Scot!!!

Sir Prince tells the story of getting Princess brownie points by flying to Melbourne and hiring a car to travel half way across the state to visit ma in-law for her 95th birthday …. all to get “F%$# off I’m busy playing cards” $3,000 and two stuffed up flight bookings The Prince blows the brownie points in one hit …. something to do with “Stupid old fart” or similar comment.
Missing link calls ,,,,,, END OF CIRCLE …..

its 8.55PM Another Hash record and Two Dogs goes home happy!!!!

Pssst ……..A NEW campaign for GM is looming ….. Croc has Nathan Tinckler in toe and the price of votes is sky rocketing …. seems flights to the football in Sydney are on offer too. Aussie says can’t buy me !!!!! I’m a Suns supporter through and through …. “ But how much are you paying ?????? “
Morgan Gallop poll results to be published next week.

DIARY Note ……………. Anniversary Milestone Awards dinner run ….. KBs Country estate Tallebudgera……on 2nd May ( The public holiday so a 5pm start) Numbers are essential let Caustic or Missing Link know please.
Hash formal with Jacket dress code ….. Bonfire Bar B Q and KBs catering.

On On!!
KB.