Category Archives: Hash Trash

Run 2189…Nasty

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Date: 14th October 2019………………………….
Location: Broadbeach …………………………
Runners:39………………………………………….

Run Pictures………………………………………..

Circumference‘s Run Report

The theme of this evening’s event was the celebration of the Bavarian festival known as Oktoberfest. Hashers were greeted to a slab of Mid Strength on their arrival at Cascade Gardens. Also there was a muti-coloured flag which many nationalities could identify with including Poms, Aussies including indigenous, Kiwis, Germans and even those from Belgium. So with the basics of beer and multi-national recognition being satisfied, all that was left was a run and walk before getting down to some serious partying. Just for a welcome change, the trails went east past the massive new toilet block in the park and down to the Jewel towers before back along the beach path under a fairly bright new moon which might explain the number of LUNARtics that were out and about on the roads and encountered going to and from hash.

After arriving back at the venue, and some quick change into theme clobber, hashers swarmed on the cheap next to nothing German beers. Entrees were served progressively by hare, Nasty. It was just a matter of moving from table to table to score each dish.They included party pies, spicy spam, mini wieners with mini gherkins drowned in mustard. Mains were served up first to the Sirs before the plebs got their snouts in the trough. A conga line went around the BBQ’s so as to enable hashers to collect their servings of kranskis, sauerkraut, onions and choice of mustards. Once all were served, there was a dinner conversation or more like an interrogation of a visitor that took place. Commandant VD of Dept of SHIT (Security, Homeland,Immigration and Terrorism)  wanted to know all about our German visitor, Jannes. His questioning of Jannes was non-stop as he probed into his perspective on refugees in his home country and amongst other things  his personal life and current relationship. Jannes, showing maturity beyond his years and not to be put off ploughed on through his meal feeling comfortable that he had survived the inquisitive double barrelled questioning as a result of the two-headed Tasmanian’s prying. Strudel and ice-cream made Jannes feeling even more relaxed when his favourite dessert was served up.

Acting GM, Sir PV called all to prepare for the circle and soon Nasty was out for a down down and critiques from the punters. Ball Bags again didn’t disappoint and unloaded in his spiel on a particular marking of a check. A 2/10 rating isn’t too bad from this hasher who has known to go down to the minuses. Weekly who has self assessed himself as fit gave a 8/10 score for the scenic walk. In keeping with the Bavarian theme, visitor Jannes was asked to speak on the nosh. He stepped into the circle wearing his German bikie colours clobber which identified him as a card carrying support member of the Hammer of Thor gang. He rated all the food that had been served as being very good. Apparently motor bikes are Jannes forte if anyone needs any repairs done.

The returning runners were next up for downtowns and Mad Mike, Monthly, Wrong Way and Ballpoint took centre stage. Hash milestones of 500 runs and 1200 runs were recognised for Weekly and Sir Botcho respectively. As Weekly is a circa 1978 hasher, it has taken him 41 years to reach his milestone. However a fairly long stretch in Rotary on Monday night over the years apparently put a severe handbrake on his accumulation.Sir Botcho on the other hand has clocked his numbers up since 1982.

Sir PV then told all some stories about the wonderful hashing life of the recently departed Darwin Don (RIP) which concluded with a hash hymn.

Proxy was called out for providing the slab of Mid Strength as birthday beers. Ballpoint declared a vote of no confidence in the committee for not recognising Sir Botcho’s 1200 run milestone the week before without that hasher actually having to remind them. He delivered a limerick about Sir Botcho being an ex -Kiwi and that country’s reputation about what goes on in the sheep pen stays in the pen.

A proud Kiwi Hashman named Sir Botcho

Loved his running, his red wine, his Cappuccino…

He’d say ” My 1200 Hash runs do attest,

That Hashing in New Zealand is the best

Coz in the circle, shagging of shee is the go

The Bavarian boys in their Oktoberfest clobber were called into the circle for judging of Fashions in the Beer Circle by Jannes. Swollen Colon was judged the winner in a little number he had knocked up in his factory from some material that afternoon. It included beige coloured Lederhosen with braces.

Pepe seized upon the moment to charge Swollen with cheating as a front runner but the more experienced Swollen gave his explanation as superior hashing skills which included downing a few cans in his beer stein prior to the run.

It would appear that every time Kitchen Bitch leaves for a social event, the papparazzi are there to snap him as he regularly appears in the social pages of the Sunday Mail and gets seen by all and sundry as they read the newspaper over Sunday breakfast.
Apparently KB is an avid believer in BIFF, not the bring Back the Biff version in footy but attending the Brisbane International Film Festival. Anyhow mark down another down down for social butterfly KB. At least he escaped  M’Latrine’s camera this time which can far more intrusive and telling.

Then came the cultural part of the evening when Monthly sang opera in both German and then followed up with the English sub-titles included rendition. It certainly raised the standard of singing that is normally heard in hash circles.

Carry-over POW, Cum Smoke threw up a few decoy BS nominations before settling on Truck Tyres as the new winner. Apparently he now considers himself an expert in the building industry with his recent commentary on some projects where hashers are involved. Cum Smoke also bestowed the title of an honorary  QBBC building inspector on him as well as POW.

Sorry folks, but I have to abruptly finish this report as it looks like I am about to be raided by the AFP in their crackdown on freedom of speech issues concerning possible National Secrets. I am not sure why but maybe PM Sco Mo is still a bit pissed off about anyone spreading the rumour circulating about him crapping his pants at the Engadine Maccas in the Shire after the 1997 Super League Grand Final , Sharks V Broncos. So there you have it, the rumour will not go away and this issue has certainly caused a bit of a stink, pardon the pun, over time in the halls of power. However PM no really gives a you no what anymore whether you did or didn’t have an accidental crap , when we have other con artist politicians running around plying us with BS and bunging on about how good they are and trying to get us to believe in their crap.

On On
Circumference  (There are several rumours circulating about regular scribe’s Carefree’s absence. Is he really currently partying on Lord Howe Island or involved in the remake of the movie version of Gilligan’s Island where he could be standing in for the actor playing Thurston Howell III ?)