Run: 1682
Hares: Kitchen Bitch
Location: Riverside Park, Budds Beach
Date: 25^th January, 2010

It was obvious that this would be a remarkable evening when the pack came upon Pizza at the drink stop dispensing his tasty dark homebrew from the mini keg on his ute. This was after a pleasant canter through the Mackintosh Island park. Back at the On On site Kitchen Bitch had transformed the waterside park into an exclusive restaurant complete with table settings, candles and tablecloths. The hierarchy table even had wedding style covered chairs and a “bridal” feel that was brought to the attention of the hoi poloi by BB. The head of the “death by accident” Marlin we were going to consume completed the picture.

At post run drinks Caustic Crusader remarked that some trail markings had been washed away by footpath cleaning. Aussie agreed that the hare may have misjudged the anal factor of main beach residents and their clean footpaths but thought it was a good run as did Rug.

The first course was marlin in a marinade of lime juice and pomegranate with whole fennel on the side. Main was a delightful barbequed marlin fillet over baked tomatoes and a sauce of caperberrys, strawberries, roasted garlic and spinach leaves. Desert was an exotic fruit salad and premium ice cream. Kitchen Bitch, assisted by Sir Prince Valiant, Phil and Pizza, has certainly raised the bar in matters gastronomique and deserves congratulations from all of the hash.

Assistant Grand Master and Minister for Loose Structures, Sir Prince, opened the optional sitting/standing circle at 9.30. For reasons known only to himself Latrine immediately sat on the ice. Last runner home, Old Fart, said he hahplenty to say about the run until the second course. Shat described the nosh as “a magnificent effort “The hare and chef told the circle he was criticized for his budget blow-out at the Indy run so he thought he would get square. He also thanked his “kitchen bitches Sir Prince and Phil and was given a Down Down for his efforts. Pizza was`also given a DD for his home brew. Latrine was allowed off the ice and Sir Prince commented that he used the same dye in his hair as was in the beer.

Then BB got on the ice and Missing Link told the circle how he puts all Gold Coast Hashers on ice on runs he sets at Intehashers. Apparently in Burma Flasher injured himself on purpose to avoid an icing at one of BB’s runs.

Our esteemed Grand Master, Nasty called for the Prick of the Week and described the incumbent, Phil, as a helpful Prick. Phil’s nominees to succeed him were;

Sir Prince then called out Phil for his naming. As he has had 14 vasectomies and 13 reversals he was name Cum Again!! In a moving ceremony Sir Prince anointed our newest hash mans head. Welcome Cum Again!

Miscarriage announced that next weeks run would be back to the “roots” after the gastronomical highs of this weeks run. On behalf of all Scots Rug reminded everybody it was Robbie Burns birthday. DD’s went to returning runners, Bent Banana, who had been at Tamworth learning Line Dancing and Jigsaw who had been in Sydney and on the road visiting his 7 brothers.

Kitchen Bitch charged Hitler and Pussy Boy for arriving at Hash on skateboards and Swollen Colon for changing out of his new shoes before the circle. Crocodile told a story about some small kids at school that he must have learnt from his Grandson and was given a DD as was Rug for being on the phone Russian.

The final DD was given to Cum Smoke and Swollen Colon for ruining the photos of some innocent tourists.

The GM closed the circle around midnight .

Many thanks to Kitchen Bitch for a monumental effort.

ON ON

Now Loved

On Sec

Run: 1681
Hares: Swollen Colon & Caustic Cursader
Location: Sylvan Family Park, Benowa
Date: 18th January, 2010

On a very sticky night a good turnout of the hash enjoyed the the collective efforts of Swollen Colon(SC) and Caustic Crusader(CC).

In the circle Old Fart commented thart he was “checking,checking,checking”but that it was a good run and he enjoyed it.
The Grand Master accused Miscarriage of leading him astray on an on back but Miscarriage deflected a down down by showing his pissy little cut and decalaring that vertically challenged guys should not have to go over fences.

Ferret said the nosh was the best this year and Cum Smoke enjoyed a DD for having a lamington too many.

Indeed the nosh was excellent.Well done boys!

Caustic was immediately called out again for throwing his DD over our venerated heirarchy member,Botcho,and received another one.

The Minister for Loose Beginnings,Sir Prince,reported that Show Pony had to attend his son’s wedding with wives 1,2and 4 present.It’s a pity wife #3 couldn’t make it to make the perfect quartet.Returning runners Latrine,Pussy Boy ,Now Loved ,Blowfly and Tight Arse all enjoyed DD’s.

TIght Arse blamed Latino dancing for his absence and admitted to divided loyalty which may have something to do with a certain Roxy.Latrine claimed he had been at sea and some wag interjected”up Loders Creek”.Cum Smoke,Dumbshit and Now Loved were all noted for new shoes and Aussie was very vocal about this but it turned out he was wearing thongs.

Sir Prince claimed Dumbshit had left and right written on his socks.The Grand Master called for Prick of the Week and the incumbent,Seamen,looked resplendent with the nosedick hanging out of the glasses.His candidates were Moonbeams for telling him to give it to Aussie , Aussie for telling him to give it to Moonbeams and Cum Smoke for avoiding him on the run.However,he settled on Phil using the twisted logic(is there any other sort in Hash?)that Phil had been at Hash for 4 months and never had it whereas Seamen got it his first week back after a prolonged absence.Phil did well with with the yardglass.

Miscarriage claimed he googled twitter to find it was the part of a girls body between the twat and the shitter.

Pisspoor was accused of eating out alot and claimed his wife can’t cook .Perhaps that’s why he came to hash on his 41st wedding anniversary.

Josephine charged Cum Smoke with buying a trailer from an old pensioner for $100.Pommy reported a delicate moment when he mistakenly showed his kids a picture of Pizza in full POW regalia on the website.It would appear he struggled to explain to them what actually happened at hash
.
Maggs told the circle how he was driving Pisspoor home after hash last week and his car stalled and he nearly rammed a police car.
The cops checked out all the eskies and other hash paraphanalia in the back but let him go to the cheers of those people on a nearby balcony.Maggs must have given the police his best angelic look.
Luckily Pisspoor remained quiet.Botcho announced that Sir Rabbit is the keeper of the big cooking pots.
Kitchen Bitch has next weeks run and promised a pre Australia Day extravaganza.His past efforts have been excellent so this is not to be missed.
With that the GM closed the circle.

Congratulations to Swollen Colon and Caustic Crusader for a job well done!
After a short absence in the wilds of eastern suburbs Sydney I would just like to say how great it is to be back at hash.

ON ON
Now Loved.
On Sec.