Date: 8 th October  2018…………………………
Location:Broadbeach …………………………….
Runners: 25…………………………………………..
Run Pictures……………………………………..

Well after being chucked in the deep end last week, our esteemed GM Weekly grabbed me by the ankles and held my head underwater until I agreed to write the run report again. God help me I pray for the return of FA to get me out of this.
Circle opened at exactly 8.00pm. Weekly being a stickler for doing things by hours and half hours perhaps from some childhood fetish of sitting on the potty at set times. Weekly was without his signature cigar, he looked like a dehorned rhino, in fact he resembles that more than Churchill.

First up he called for returning runners and three stepped forward with dry tongues for a freebie –

• S Bends returned from a luxury cruise from north America to Japan,
• VD from the epic Iberian Peninsula Shathouse bike ride
• Swollen Colon, not sure where he returned from, probably the City    All got down downs.
• Arsenik called up for ten runs and given a 10 run T shirt. Does that mean those with 1,000 runs get 100 T shirts ??? Link gave him a note

Now Loved was pouring the down down drinks, he must be a “Trusty” of S Bends

We sat down to eat ,I happened to sit next to Hardon, I can assure you all that I did hear him breathing, well I think I did, so he remains above ground level for the time being. But saw him Wednesday and he informed me that next day he was ill from food contamination !!

KB  gave a note for Sweat Hog’s down down for   $200,000 raised on his recent outback epic journey where he traded Gold Coast beach sand for desert red sand. Well done RA.

Brew master S Bends gave a description of the special beer for the night – Chinese “Lucky Beer” to commerce the Long walk when Mao took power there.

Botcho reported on the run as “Fantastic went this way and that way over the railway line” – he can’t tell a train from a tram  – Blackie and Bent Banana were mentioned as runners of note.

Caustic C gave the walk report as “being in the moonlight , so torches were not necessary – how romantic. Foxtrot gave a note for the Hare, but as it was a bit weak, the heavy guns were called in Jigsaw!   He sang  like  Pavarotti  in opera – missed his calling in life

KB gave the food report saying that it was not from a noodle box, well how about that! – was that all he could think of ?? Well actually the burgers were from a bygone era – with beetroot and tinned pine apple they reminded me of my callow youth scoffing down a late night hamburger after failing to win a chick at the Saturday night dance in Launceston. I usually ended up with red beet stain over my white shirt, which I wore  with a narrow tie, reefer jacket and brown suede shoes, I thought I was another Errol Flynn. But a bit more history here – The hare Missing Link was in the same class at Launceston High as my brother Layup (Brisbane hash). Layup tells me that The Link was the most successful guy at seducing high school chicks and that he never missed out, much to the envy of the rest, who never made it. So the name Missing Link is not appropriate it should be Lucky  Link, or perhaps Pants Man Link – hash renaming here.

The Ra Sweat Hog called from noms from the floor. Botcho called Blackie for getting on the tram with no go card- probably does not have one and if caught would plead senility

KB called up Caustic C for buying a new car from a Honda  dealer – KB seems to think he has a Hash Monopoly.

B Banana called out Rabbit for a fishing trip with only one fish caught – worked out at $800 per Kg.

S Hog then acted like a stand up comic at an RSL bingo night, told a few corny jokes one about a NZ horse that talked, reminded me of those old Ed The Talking horse movies we kids loved.

Swollen Colon achieved 150 runs. He was called out and with  that ridiculous beanie, resembled a rotund garden  gnome. After slipping his cap on he was transformed like the prince in a fairy tale in to a hashman..

KB in his office of Chief Inspector of Hash attire – warned all they they must be dressed in Hashoween attire for the Hashoween run, otherwise they will be sent home in disgrace.

At the end of the night Pants Man Link offered the left over pineapple and beetroot but there were no takers. I assume he took it home, put it in the freezer to bring out as nosh on his next run  – – did all the hamburgers get eaten ???? – So beware !

Gm Weekly called on Foxtrot to end circle, but he gave a very weak rendition of Me me me me me hardly audible  except for those hashmen with hearing aids ( a few now I believe). He was corrected by the Gm and circle ended at 8.37 pm.

Winston Churchill quote for the week – –

Life can either be accepted or changed. If it is not accepted, it must be changed. If it cannot be changed, then it must be accepted

Acing scribe Brengun

Date: 1st October  2018…………………………
Location:Benowa …………………………………
Runners: 18…………………………………………..
Run Pictures……………………………………..

Well,  after my maiden run set and big catering effort to meet the Gourmet Hash standards –  which are Michelin 5 star, I was press ganged by our eminent GM Weekly, to act as scribe in the absence of FA. My second  maiden event  in two weeks –Crikey, talk about being thrown in the deep end!

The pack met in Bruce Small Park adjacent to the tavern, for a 5.00 pm. start.  (Thinking of Bruce Small – I had a red 24 inch Malvern Star bike as a kid in Launceston), it was again cold, but unlike last week not wet. There were – drum roll, wait for it!  More runners than walkers. At first it appeared that it was a record in the recent anals of GCHHH, the trend of ageing and thus walking had been reversed, but alas this was not so, as on return, a number of non – walkers were lurking around the car park. Is this a third category forming? runners, walkers and non-walkers??

The run went north through the park into streets, then in to a huge waterway leading to a big manmade lake where the runners peeled off around the south side of the lake and walkers returned via streets. Run 6 km. Walk 3.5 km. Trail was well marked (Blackie has had heaps of experience) Apart from that it was a pleasant enough trail with a mix of parkland and street. Blackie actually ran the trail too !!

We then piled in to our chariots to Blackies canalside joint. He had the usual set up around the pool with seating for all. As an Oktoberfest run it supposedly had a German flavour.

The circle was called by GM Weekly,. Fanny C reported on the nosh and stated that after twenty years Blackie who must be a slow learner,had finally got the spag bol right. However it was less German and  more like a World Culinary Fiesta. The Oetinger Pils was top German stuff. But the entree of cabana, cheddar and crackers was reminiscent of an Australian 1950’s wedding shower, minus the toothpicks with chunks of pineapple and coloured mini pickled onions. The main was excellent spag-bol, but this dish is from south of the European Alps, the land of Mussolini, not Hitler. The dessert was excellent but from west of the Rhine, the land of De Gaulle, French cheesecake but at least German Ice cream-  as it was from Aldi.

The GM got the circle going and called for returning  runners, Jiggy eagerly stepped forward (been in Vietnam on a motor bike for 800 km. With no licence and thus no travel insurance cover, obviously not in to risk management, he likes to live on the edge), hoping for a free drink, but he was sent humiliatingly  back for not been away long enough, nobody else qualified either.. I noticed Hardon back prematurely from the Portuguese cycle epic, he had a healh event, but he looked healthy enough to last at least until after next Xmas.

GM held SOW award back for next week as miscreants away. Proceedings  were continually interrupted by Fanny C with his fart machine punctuating all speeches. I heard that he uses this at home for genteel dinner parties with his cultured friends. This together with honking from the GM’s baby horn gave a German effect, sort of like the Berlin Symphony Orchestra

• Hare Blackie got a down down for being the hare
• Arsenic got one for not returning his passport from the recent bike event.

Gm reported 45 booked for Melbourne cup lunch, so it is almost full – hurry if you want to get a seat.

Charged from the floor –

• Now Loved currying favour with the GM by returning a lost property mug.
• Fanny C for his continual rude interruptions with his fart machine (he reckons it is a duck quack).
• Jiggy for accusing Now Loved of drinking down down dregs (but it was probably true).
• Fullershit for standing in the rain – I forget where and when, but I guess he got wet.
• Bent Banana was reported by Exelpet for lurking in the bush and doing part of the run in reverse, and being around Flasher too much, is Flasher his Guru???

Wrong Way Woodsy was presented with his Old Farts Cap he had achieved the 150 runs required in the amazing space of only 25 years. But he claimed he had done more and the records were corrupted, he would say that!. He also pointed out he had been MIA for 25 years, does that also mean he clips 25 years off his age, making him in fact to be about 50 years old ??? He did not display young age behaviour when drinking his down down,  he got his mug tangled in the peak of his new Old Farts Cap and nearly pulled it off, oh dear what old age does to one.

WWW  also claimed to have sponsored GCHHH very first ever run with petty cash destined  for car repairs at his then employer Avis. That is embezzlement,  No wonder rental cars are so expensive.

Winston Churchill’s quote for the week –

“We contend that for a nation to try to tax itself into prosperity is like a man standing in a bucket and trying to lift himself up by the handle.

Next week’s run by Missing Link at Cascade gardens and he promises hamburgers actually containing real meat.Hmmmm we will see.
Circle closed by Fanny Charmer at 8.00pm.

Acting Scribe – Brengun

Date: 28th September  2018………………….
Location: Costa D’oro Surfers Paradaise..

Hosts: Birthday Boys Pizza & Botcho……..

Run Pictures………………………………………
What more can one say “Fun ,Fun, Fun  with your Hashing Mates”

Date: 24th September  2018……………………
Location:Chevron Island ………………………..
Runners: 19…………………………………………..
Run Pictures……………………………………..

Monday 24^th September 2018.

Chevron Island. 19 Runners.

This night was cold with a keen wind that made the runners shiver and seek a warmer jacket. Mademoiselle Latrine adored himself with a black garbage bag. Rain was eminent but the enthusiastic runners wore a bright face and commenced the run anyway.

Bren Gun, the hare and cook did a wonderful job ferrying whole hams, bread, tomatoes, fresh lettuce and sauces from his residence. Sir Botcho did a great job in carving up the ham.  The ice cream with blue berries appeared a little later. There was no need to keep the ice cream in the deep freezer this evening.

8:10pm.  Circle opened. GM Weekly arranged the hash trailer to be removed from the park area. As Bren Gun would be in the area next day, this was tasked to him.

Visitors.   This was Rice Man. He was welcomed in the circle with a down down.

Returning runners.  These were Mademoiselle Latrine, Link and Caustic. These guys were globetrotting and had interesting stories to tell. A down down to these guys as well.

Run report.    Exelpet said it was a good run in the cold night but he thought a nasal spray would be good to have on this cold evening.

1. The RA is away on a 4×4 adventure so he could not join the evening run. He was given a down down all the same for being such a good fellow.

A reminder was given about our future events. The Oktoberfest and the GM luncheon are the big events happening soon.

The GM was challenged in keeping the circle together while it was raining. When he looked up from his notes, no one was around him. He turned around to see where the runners where. They were all sheltering under the tree with the scribe whom had difficulty making notes on soaking wet writing paper. We noticed that the GM had droplets of water running off his nose. May be Exelpet was right that runners needed that nasal spray tonight. There were no more down downs as it was coming down.

Winston Churchill. Quote of the evening.

“The main vice of capitalism is the uneven distribution of prosperity. The main vice of socialism is the even distribution of misery.”

Good report/ feed back.     Hello mate. Are you OK?

PS: 5pm start next week

8:20pm. Fanny Charmer closed the circle.

Date: 17th September  2018……………………
Location:Budds Beach ……………………………
Runners: 24…………………………………………..
Run Pictures……………………………………..

The night was cool with a strong wind blowing as it has been doing for some days.

On returning, the runners explained they had some difficulty in finding some arrows and the trail disappeared. The arrows were marked by the hare little knowing that later during that day, a fence was erected and the road closed, as there were pavement repairs in progress.

But the smell of hamburger patties and fried onions on the BBQ relaxed the runners and they looked forward to the night’s meal. The hamburgers and all the fillings and side dishes was followed by ice cream on a stick.

8:30pm. Our GM Weekly called on Sweet Hog to give the run report. A little disappointed, as the arrows were invisible as for the above reason.

Sir Jo added to comment that all runners were on trail as there was no trail to follow. Also for the above reason.

Food report, by Bent Banana.  For his cooking efforts, Aussie was given a down down.

Future or coming events.  These are the Oktoberfest 1^st October. Contact Blackie.  The Grand Master Luncheon on the 4^th November. The runners were asked to book early to assist planning.  V 8 handicap 15^th October

RA report.    Sir Black Stump was congratulated on his achievements in last weekend Triathlon. He was in the pack of the first 200 of several hundred participants.  Note that this Triathlon will not be contested again in the near future on the Gold Coast. Well done. A down down was also in order for this iron man.

There were three birthday boys. These were, Sir Rabbit, Sir Botcho and Foxtrot Oscar (May be the other way around) They were encouraged into the circle and with their mugs charged, other runners sang the birthday choirs. A down down followed.

We were all pleased to see Rock Hard after his long absence from recovery. All the hash members wish him well and sorry that there was only a short time that we could chat and wish him well, before he left. I am sure many of us will keep in contact with him. Are you OK mate?

The RA told a joke about the Irish hole digger. On fellow dug the hole while the other filled it in. There was a third guy but he was off work ill.

The acting booze master will be Poxy.

Truckie will be away and on the move for the next couple of weeks. Any offers on collecting the hash trailer and delivering it to the run next week.

The recent bike run passport answers to be handed to the GM for transmission to Council.

Bren Gun will arrange next week run. This is his first set run as a hare so please support this evening. He is going to do his best to keep up the high standards of hash runs.

Sweat Hog announces a big thank you to all of those supported his endeavor to raise monies in support of the Prostrate Cancer Foundation of Australia. He has exceeded expectations of donations.

Sweat Hog has also organized a 4×4 run and adventure trip through the Simpson Desert. The RA will be away for two weeks having fun on the bush adventure. Donations have also been received from each driver. Many thanks for this hash man in his charity in helping other men.

Quote of the week.  Winston Churchill.

“If Britain must choose between Europe and the open sea, she must always choose the open sea.”

8:50pm.  Circle closed.

That’s all folks.

ON ON Sec.