Author Archives: Botcho

Run 1787

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Run: 1787
Date: Monday 30th January 2012
Hare: Blowfly & Veteran
Venue: Len Fox Park, Labrador
Runners: 25

Weeks to AGPU: 19
Where was Caustic tonight with the run being held in his favorite part of the Gold Coast, Labrador, with it’s sweeping landscapes, endless trails, vast bushland, and stunning vistas. Even Aussie made the 555 metre trip from his new palatial abode up the road.
There was even some recent sightings of Latrine indicating a possible come back but alas the last sighting was of him with packed bags boarding a bus heading, allegedly, towards the airport, talk about extreme measures to miss a run!
Actually considering the massive down pours we’ve been having, Trail Master, Veteran stepped up to the plate and delivered well at short notice. Blowfly had put his hand up to do the food but said that wife, work and new baby meant he didn’t have time to set a run, another example of a pathetic excuse.
The trail started in the usual direction, north then west along Central Street. Soon the first check then north again before the inevitable zig zag through the back streets of beyond. I managed to find the first on back but sadly only Rectum joined me as the others had strayed behind in the humid conditions and continued on trail.
We soon crossed Government Road and headed along the path towards the Aussie Rules ground. Around the oval then another check before the start for home eastward up the hill and again across Government Road and towards the sports centre. Sir Slab and I lost the trail here as Swollen and Rectum continued on trail.
We figured we’d soon pick them up if we headed along Turpin Road and sure enough as we emerged at the Broadwater we came across the walkers and the two front runners for the sprint home.
Sadly Flasher had a crook leg so he failed, yet again, to find another alternative route through Labrador. Aussie gave the run a good report saying it  was well marked but could have done with some more checks, 8/10. The fine feast of garlic bread, pasta dish & home made ice cream, prepared by Blowfly was given a “very nice” report by KB and received 7/10.
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Down Downs;
Veteran & Blowfly; Hares
Swollen, Blowfly, Moonbeams & Missing Link; Returning runners (with some piss poor excuses like new babies and bike prangs)
Botulism; Trying to organise golf day on a lake then trying to blame the RA
Moonbeams; Not singing & holding drink in wrong hand
Aussie; Driving 555 metres to run
Blowfly; Wrong hand and being absent too long
Missing link; No gift for GM after extensive trip to Sydney
Swollen; Away too long
KG; Late
Moonbeams; Trying to charge Botulism with slack web maintenance
Sir Prince Valiant; Trying to charge Sir Slab with “forcing” crew to drink three pints after Splinter Lunch
Aussie; Van abuse?
Aussie; Blacky abuse

DON’T FORGET BOTCHO’S SPLINTER HASH GOLF EXTRAVAGANZA FROM HIS PLACE FRIDAY 24TH FEBRUARY, GOLF COMMENCING AT 09:00 SHARP. PLEASE LET BOTCHO KNOW IF YOU’RE COMING TO GOLF AND OR LUNCH. SPECIAL GUEST APPEARANCE TIPPED.
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On On from “The Desk”
Two Dogs

Splinter Hash Lunch 27th January 2012

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Date: Friday 27th January. 2012

Venue: Cav’s steak House. Labrador

Host: Hierarchy

Twenty hardy Splinter Hashers braved stormy conditions to attend this months lunch. Due to the flooding of Botcho’s Golf Course the lunch moved to Cav’s Steak House. Fine wine and food was enjoyed by all that attended.

It was great to see a couple of returning runners. Welcome back Fucksoff and Excelpet, trust that we will see you at future lunches.

February’s Lunch will be a golf day so get those clubs out.

on on

Run 1786

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Run: 1786
Date: Monday 23rd January 2012
Hare: Rug “Haggis Run”
Venue: Hansford Road, Coombabah
Runners: 26

Weeks to AGPU: 20
The huge down pour a few hours before the run sent the message that the run was in danger of becoming another wet weather debacle. However Rug, determined as ever, reset the run with toilet paper and paper strips held down by rocks for checks to ensure something of a trail would be visible.
A good pack of 26, especially considering the conditions, showed obviously responding to the marketing initiative of Rug by calling this his famous “Haggis on Hansford Run”. We were set on our way east along Hansford Road, but it wasn’t long before we ran out of trail and had to turn back and down the bike path heading south.
Another check then left, east again, and right around the loop. Caustic and I over ran the turn and had to turn back and employ some local knowledge to have us soon back at the front of the pack.
Up over the fence I went only to discover it wasn’t locked at all and was left “swinging in the breeze”. Into the environment park we went facing off with the mob of Roos upset at us disturbing their evening feed.
Along the park tracks we went, left then left again, right and right again. Yet another check, which saw me, Fabio and new guy, Martin heading the wrong way. Again local knowledge, or belief in said knowledge, took over as the three of us headed along the creek to head off the pack. We eventually found the trail again, where it came out of the familiar swamp section, happy to have missed this leg.
Now well in front we continued along the creek, back on the road before heading along the boardwalk, where we had earlier spied the walkers. Another kilometre or so along the walk ways before turning north along the back street before reconnecting with Hansford Road for the short and sharp sprint home.
A few other suspects came in at varying times indicating that it seemed several trails had been on offer or invented by the hounds. Considering the conditions prior to the run it was well acknowledged and given a glowing report by Sir Slab, although he did get lost at the end.
A good mark of 7.35 ensured. Given the circle was held early Aussie, the assistant chef, was asked to give an appraisal of the complex feast being prepared and he assured it was all class and gave it a 7.5/10. The feast of 10YO scotch nips, soup, haggis, shortbread and dessert was well received. Of note was the official Haggis ceremony presided over by an enthusiastic Caustic, who is still struggling to remove his blue paint from his Braveheart face.
It was a scene worth remembering; 26 blokes standing around a Haggis, drinking scotch and listening to a Mel Gibson look alike recite Scottish verse in the midst of a major down pour. We should have filmed it, if some 10 year old kid can get 11 million hits on u-tube for singing some rap song about mutts and goldfish surefly we can become a cult following!
Well done Rug, a classic evening to be well remembered, and extra points for delivering in atrocious conditions.
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Down Downs;
Rug; Hare

Cumsmoke; Some shit about buying chicken roll whilst waiting for dinner?

Aussie & BB; Drinking from wrong hand and BB not picking up

Caustic; Not assisting in early preparations of Scottish theme

Truck Tyre & BB; Drinking from wrong hand and BB not picking up

Fabio & Martin; For passing RA too many times on run

Sir Cumference; Ring in, winning raffle at RA & Point Two’s local club at “Tannywhatsit”

Non Aussies x 9; Down down to national anthem

Sir Slab, Fabio & Martin; In possession of non Australian Passports

Cumsmoke; POW via Crocodile for failing in his job to clear rubbish from his canal

Ferret; 800 runs

Australia Day breakfast from 09:00 at Budds Beach, bring chair and drinks (also some on sale), food provided. Let GM know if you can make it.


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On On from “The Desk”
Two Dogs 

Brave Heart Needs help

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hello Hashers
As you know I took it upon myself to regalle myself in Scottish resplendent attire including the battle face blue “woad”

I ran out of time today and had to stop at Bunnings and grabbed a small can of blue paint which the attendant assured me was for face painting;I have just returned home after a quick pit stop at the Pizza ‘Hut” and tried to remove the “face paint”

It didnt “remove “!!

After reading the can it was for painting “FACE BRICKS” !!!

Has anybody got any ideas how to remove without reverting to Hannibal Lectern tactics ??

I have tried soap,white spirit ,mild caustic soda,and paraffin swab !!

No good !!

Meeting with my bankers in the morning to try and get an extension to my default mortgage and would appreciate an early call;the earlier the better !!

On ON

Caustic

Run 1785

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Run 1785
Date: Monday 16th Jan. 2012
Hare: Truck Tyres
Venue: Pizzey Park, Miami
Runners: 19

Weeks to AGPU: 21

 A small pack assembled at the designated start point, spur of pacific av. Miami. Conditions were bleak, overcast and threatening rain, half the pack in raincoats.

 The Hare Truck Tyre’s instructions were quite clear, but not the markings of chalk, flour, paper and would probably get washed out. The runners set of to Pacific Av. on trail, left into Oceanic Dr. and on to Pizzey Dr. at this point rain, rain and more rain, markings holding up but only just, a left turn into Pizzey Park Sporting Complex and on through some pretty good running hash territory, ably lead by FRB’S Miscarriage and new runner Favio (aka James).

The pack confused at this point due to return markings, suddenly realized we have short cutted a big portion of the run so far. Half the pack decided enough of the wet weather and headed home on the return markings, Which left Miscarriage, Fabio ( aka James) Bent Banana and Veteran to make a decent run of it, all be it a wet run. Not on trail to Bardon Av.

The now small pack headed past the Gold Coast Burleigh Heads Golf Club, through some back streets on through the East side of Pizzey Park and on on home.

Back at the car park the now wet pack had vanished like water rats to the on on venue the Junior Rugby League Club. Unbeknown to the Hare were having there AGM. However, ignoring that we were undercover with lights on one section of the there deck, I think they thought we were part of the club.

The Hare went missing for some time, it was thought he may have done a runner, but not so, on returning we were greeted with a meal best described as left over xmas lunch. Starters corn chips salsa dip. Main. Ham, Salad and tomato onion dish’s. Desert. Trifle, Jelly and Peach’s. The good part of this unusual menu there was plenty of it.

 Circle was called approx. 8.30pm G.M. Shat called upon Caustic to critic the run. In his exact words ‘ I managed to stay dry’ Caustic must have been running with an umbrella ‘ ‘good run under the circumstances’ gave it a 7.75

 G.M. Shat called Cumsmoke to critic the food. I could see where this was going was not disappointed. Slammed the salad, liked the Desert. score 2

 Stand in RA Miscarriage called out Cumsmoke for DD overheard saying Blackie was full of sh*t terrible thing to say. Other DD’S for misdemeanors. Pizza, Flasher, Fabio( aka James) Bigamist and Caustic

 Visitors. DD’S Bigamist, Little Dogs and Fabio ( aka James)

A good wet Hash nite was had by all, well done Truck Tyres

 On On Veteran

Don’t forget Botcho’s Splinter Hash Golf Day From his place Friday 27th Jan. Golf commencing at 9:00 am Pre lunch drinks 11:30 and lunch from 12:00. Please let Botcho know if your coming to Golf and or lunch only. He needs to know numbers.  Special Guest “Wishful Thinking” will be attending