Run: 1996

Date: 1/02/2016

Location: West Burleigh

Hares:Elvis

Hashers: 28

Billed as the run from “Gracelands”, tonight’s run was brought to you by Elvis and as his last “restaurant run” was so well received, tonight was another “restaurant run” from the Silver Thai on Tallebudgera Creek Road.

The operators of this fine establishment really deserve praise and our patronage because for $15.00 a head they welcome us warmly and provide us with copious amounts of good quality food.

Furthermore, they are more than happy to let us have our circle and set up our booze outside their restaurant, with no pressure at all being put on us to buy their booze. It was obviously a very popular night because there were more than 35 of us there, despite the fucking awful heat which we had to endure!!

The run:

The run started from outside the Silver Thai restaurant with a set of very complex instructions being given by Elvis, with us being required to lock gates, notify people who was the last through, and all sorts of other complicated stuff, and sure enough, as Elvis, predicted.. “this is sure to end up a Hash debacle!”….and sure enough…but more on that later…

No mercy was shown by the hare to us decrepit, ageing Hashers, with the run starting by going straight up the 45 degree incline that is West Burleigh Road before subjecting us to a perilous road crossing at the apex of the hill and off into the Tallebudgera Conservation Park…so far so good…with the only thing being that the last runner was to close the gate into the conservation park, but needless to say the gate was slammed shut with some runners left on the wrong side of it!

Apparently poor Sir Prince was one of those left languishing on the wrong side of the gate. I am reliably informed that Col Klink also confronted a locked gate on the walk.

On on….We made our way through the conservation park and into the grounds of the townhouse complex on Vantage Point Road, with one of the body corporate committee members being on hand to lock the gate behind us.

Very kind of the body corporate to let a bunch of loutish Hashers invade the tranquillity of their beautiful complex!!  “I could live up here!!” says I and Truckie also got distracted admiring the real estate. Sir Rabbit, upon reaching the apex of the hill proudly proclaimed “did I tell you that I am an excellent downhill runner?” as he blew his horn and blasted off down the hill at a cracking pace.

In all the run that most of us did was around the 4km mark but we were wrongly accused of shortcutting, particularly by those who only did a longer run because they either got lost OR started following the markings of the Border Hash, which, would you believe, was running at the same time as and whose course overlapped with ours!!

The Nosh:

Tonight’s nosh was brought to you by the friendly staff at Silver Thai..hahaha..just got the pun I think…silver tie!! It was great…don’t know how they do it for $15 a head, especially given the fact that unlike most places that offer banquets at a low price, they are tight with the number of dishes they bring out…not here….the girls kept asking if we wanted more of each plate…we ended up saying “no, no, we’re full already!!”. A fine effort in finding this place Elvis and let’s face it, on a stinking hot day, it’s probably good to have somebody else do the cooking!!!

The Circle:

A funny circle outside the restaurant, with many onlookers obviously thinking “what the fuck are all these old pricks up to with their chanting and other generally raucous behaviour!!”.

First to circle was Col Klink who commented that the poor old walkers nearly got trampled by the runners on the Border Hash trail…he also commented that “the markings were pretty shit, but other than that it was ok”. Oh, Col Klink also whinged incessantly about confronting a locked gate, about his broken shoe which was hastily and well repaired by Sir Slab, and countless other moanings and groanings…don’t know how you put up with him Link!!

Weekly was asked by some of the Border Hashers who crossed our path “since when have you guys been running on a Monday?” to which Weekly replied “well, I’ve been running this Hash since about 1978 and it’s been on a Monday since then!!”….bloody Border Hashers…they had the audacity to raid our beer esky too and when asked to pay all whinged “geez, we don’t carry money on the run…come on the least you can do is give us a beer!…we’re only half way through our run”…is it any wonder this year’s committee is broke????…now on this very note of giving away beer…another interesting thing happened tonight…poor Sir Rabbit was in a visible state of distress when he got back from the run as he had somehow managed to lose his wallet with about $40 in it.

Of course the fault was all his as he showed us the operation of the “pockets” in his shorts…hardly effective retention devices for personal property as anything was likely to fly out of the flaps, and this is exactly what happened!! As circle was progressing, a young fellow with an Italian accent approached us and said “isa any one ofa yousa called Rabbit?”… “yes,yes, that’s me!!!” shouted Sir Rabbit and Vittorio said “I founda you wallet over near the car overa there”…and into the circle was dragged Vittorio to have a down-down for being a nice bloke! He downed a whole bloody can of beer…there goes the profits this week!

Our three German visitors, who tagged along with Latrine also were brought out for down-downs…welcome to Australia and to the Hash!! They are leaving soon to travel up the coast before heading back to Germany.

Col Klink called out for a down down for his fucked shoes and Sir Slabb was thanked for his duct-tape solution to the problem.

Sir Botcho was called out for recognition of his wonderful efforts on the Golf Splinter Lunch last Friday…a brilliant day Botcho…and youse can all read the words I was invited to write about it all…they’re on the website. Check the photos too…they are hilarious!

Protocol was dispensed with at this point and our GM, Rug, was called out for a double down-down for his antics at the Splinter lunch…the first for breaking Montana’s stiletto shoe (let’s not go there!) and another one for getting so shit-faced that he kept falling asleep (and for ignoring the pleas of people like your truly to get out of the sun before he got third degree burns!)

Miscarriage tried to bring a charge against one of the German visitors for playing “duff duff” music on the run and risking upsetting the members of the body corporate who let us run through their property, thinking we were all a pack of docile old farts who would cause no upset….needless to say the charge failed.

Ferrett brought a charge against Slug for running in the wrong direction on the walkers trail…charge upheld…down-down consumed!

Weekly came out to present the perpetual golf trophy…out came Sir Two Dogs (hahaha…initials STD..sexually transmitted disease!!…just thought of that one!!), Now Loved and Missing Link…a well deserved down-down for these once-a-year golfers.

Next week’s run will be Rug’s run…number 1997…the significance of that year is that Hong Kong was given back to China and it is also Chinese New Year so come along in something with a Chinese theme….that should be easy…everything we wear and use is usually made in China anyway!!

PLEASE get your forms in for the 2000^th run as it is filling fast and we don’t really want to be outnumbered by visitors, do we??