Date: 7/12/5015
Run: 1988
Location: Ashmore
Hare: Fullershit
Runners:30
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Tonight’s run, brought to you from lovely, downtown industrial Ashmore, came to you all courtesy of Fullershit and his lovely wife Lee, to whom he obviously outsourced the cooking, as she was seen to be slaving away at a hot oven at the back of Chateaux Fuller, also known as his industrial shed, from where he runs one of his many business interests, including the world famous on the Gold Coast E-Rider electric bicycle worldwide distribution centre.
On the topic of outsourcing, it is also to be duly noted that Fullershit outsourced the setting of the run to his mate from Darwin Hash, Sorry…errrr….sorry, what was that?….Exactly!!…very confusing!!
The run:
The run headed off down into the normal well-trodden path from Fullershit’s factory…yawn, yawn…here we go again, we all thought…with the only difference being that the run was to be marked with plastic ribbon tied to poles, trees and all sorts of other weird places, with two ribbons indicating a check, three ribbons an on-back or something like that!….anyway, young Sorry must have only gone out to set the run with about three metres of tape to his name ‘cause there certainly wasn’t much of it around!!
The Nosh:
The Nosh started with nibbles of two dipping jars and corn chips…nice to see the “gourmet” back in this Hash! Mains was a turkey that Fullershit (with my help) managed to massacre, along with a cooked ham….both were delicious and served with potatoes, carrot and assorted other veges, with a nice gravy (Gravox if I am not mistaken)….pity that those at the front of the queue had absolutely no idea at all about portion control and totally disregarded the presence of twenty other blokes at the back when dishing out the turkey for themselves…oh well, at least there was plenty of the ham and it was lovely!!…the crackling was a nice touch……..
but the best part of the Nosh was the theatrical entrance made by none other than KB, who roared down the street in one of his employer’s vehicles, an F-type V8 Jaguar….nice to see you again KB and it was nice to ogle your car. Our GM decided he would like to be taken for a test drive so off they roared up the street with all baffles on the exhaust open…when they returned, the GM was asked if he was going to be putting a deposit on one, his reply was “I already have…I shit myself in the front seat!” …..and with that little episode over, we all tucked into dessert…again a fine gourmet offering of…ummm…I do know there was ice cream with it….oh yes, hang on…that’s right…diced strawberries!!!…and having learnt his lesson, Fullershit was sitting there ensuring that we all only took four pieces of strawberry each! A good effort Fullershit (and Lee)!!
The Circle:
Tonight’s debacle started off with Rug….oh yes, that’s right…he is our long absent GM…..welcoming us all to circle and justifying his absence…..”I was only away for three months you know…it was supposed to have been four!”
First victim in Circle tonight…Fullershit and his Darwin mate Sorry, whom I believe is down here on the Gold Coast doing a quadruple degree at Griffith University in something to do with engineering…or was it a Cert III in arithmetic in order to qualify for all the degrees??? In any case, let’s hope he stays with the Hash as it will get our average age (currently at around 68) down considerably!! Most apologetic was dear Sorry for failing dismally in setting a well-marked run and getting us all totally off-trail, but thanks to the familiarity of the territory, not lost at all!
Now-Loved was welcomed back to Hash and out the front for having lost his passport and other belongings in downtown Bangkok! No further discussions on this topic as to do otherwise would break our golden rule…what happens on tour stays on tour!! Word does however have it that our esteemed GM was responsible for leading Now Loved somewhat astray!
Carefree was then brought out for a down-down for his part in apparently recommending the hotel where all of the disasters unfolded…oh dear!
Bluecard came out for a down-down for leaving his “mark” on the trip to Burma, with Sir Slab commenting that “next time I organise a tour I’m going to have to buy these blokes corks to bung them up!” Apparently, so disgusting was the state of BlueCard’s nether regions that he did not need a passport to cross from Burma into Thailand and he was quickly ushered through the border crossing.
The Prick of the Week award was passed with undue haste and little justification from Fullershit to Sir Prince Valiant…I don’t think that this will be end of this matter!! With SPV muttering something along the lines of “he’s not getting away with this….I’m on Hierarchy”.
It needs to be said that Mme Latrine was in excellent form tonight, carrying on in Circle like a forlorn schoolboy, gesturing, making appropriate noises and otherwise totally misbehaving, just as one should in Hash!
Nutcracker has now moved to the Gold Coast permanently so is no longer considered a visitor from the Posh Hash in Sydney…pity he’s such an old prick…doesn’t do anything to get our average age down!!
With that…Josephine announced (in the absence of Moonbeams)…end of circle!!
Next week’s run…Courtesy of Showpony and Flasher…from the sporting fields near the pigeon club and cricket club at Oxenford…right by the Oxenford Youth and Community Centre too!
Fanny Charmer
On Sec.